പ gag മു nunggu lama

p bingung...

giliran yang stu lagi deketin,,, yang lain juga deketin... kemana aja sih waktu p ngejar kamu??? gagh sadar yaa???
gagh selamanya p bisa nunggu...

yaa....
even sebenarnya, gagh mungkin juga p sama mr.blueintrovert itu lebihdari ini...

tapi. apapun bisa terjadi kann??

makanya... janganbikinp nunggu lama....

p gagh bs...

papzzz

p bingung, ap yang papz rasain sekarangsama p?? proud??dissapointed?? or what?
are u care widh me./..?? maybe u would say,,if i didnt care with u i'm not gonna bought u a credit every week. or i'm not gonna sent u money when u need.

tapipapz... dengr momz kemaren cerita,, p miris,... p sedih...
dun even knew what 2 say...

i'm falling down...
try'n stop me...

and i wanted to believe ini u.. when utell me that i'llbe ok,,,
and i tryto believein u.. buti dont...
maybe tomorrow...
i'mjust not ready for it...

Curhadh4momz

Momz..Why can't he pass away from my sight..?Why cant i forget d way he looked at me?D way he sang n d way he laugh or talked..?
Just tell me why..
Aftr all..U could tell me why,,why i could be so brave within told hm that i loved hm..Why could i loved hm..D one who maybe liked my b'frend..Then why,he couldnt be mine..?
Explain 2 me momz..Explain it 'till i fall asleep..Explain 2 me 'till i could get it n undrstand..

Momz pliss..I dont even knew which way should i pick..

Help me momz..


I wish u were undrstnd me,widhoud i'm tellng u momz..Coz i'll be vry ashamed if i told u diz..I couldnt talked 2 sist,coz she would be really jealous 4 that..

Momz..
I've got my heart breakn' into 2 pieces..U knew where it goes rite?
I knew u dont like it..I dont like it either,,but..u c..I made too much sins widh 1 of those pieces,,i'm just 2 scared that d otherz wont 4give me if i told..

Momz pliss tell me whad should i do..

aneh

hmmmm....
...

...

...

hari ini...

kayaknya lagi stresss banget deyhh...

diagnosis dokterkemarin bedalagi...

katanya radang pembuluh darah...

tadinya arthtritis.. lupus lah..

hmmm.. p capek.. mana yang bner...

p sebel..

papz dunt care widh me.. he eventold momz.. dhad he dunt even care if i couldnt walk again...hmmm

hate him.. much..
perhaps..

last nit' i was thinking.. that i;m nobody for everyone.
not in a single special space.

is there somethin' wrong widh me then??

i;m taking my 9th cig' now.. it's been 8 since diz mornng. and i couldnt stop.
i dont even know why..
well,,, i;m getting my headache now...

maybe,,, god should take my breath away. takingdiz frommy lungs.. butthenit'smeanthati'mnotliveanymore,rite?

പ kangen

P kangen...kargen sama papa-nya p...
Yang gak marah2 terus kalo dirumah... yanng mau nanyain keadaan sekolah p... yang nganter-jemput p terus..
P kangen papa yang dulu... p sayang papa... jujur banget.. pa gag pengen papa kayak gini... p gag pengen papa jadi gag betah dirumah.. p gag pengen papa marah2 terus... p gag pengen dicuekin pap terus kalo dirumah,...
P pengen ngobrol lagi sama papa... tapi p takuttt... p takut p salah ngomong...
P gag marah sama papa... p Cuma sedikit kecewa sama papa... p tau kok.. papa lebih kecewa sama p... tapi yaa....ini yang bisa p lakuin buat papa... p Cuma pengen bikin papa bangga sama p...
P Cuma pengen papa ketawa lagi kaya dulu... becanda lagi...
P Cuma pengen papa bisa tersenyum lagi dirumah...
P gag pengen ada kejadian2 aneh2 lagi dirumah... p capek... p pengen semuanya baik2 aja lagi...
P sayang papa...p sayangmama... p sayang mbak ina... p sayang semuanya...
P pengen kalian baik2 aja...p gag pengen pisah dari kalian...p gag tau mesti ngapain kalo akhirnya kita semua harus pisah...
P kangen keluarga p.... semuanya...
Papa sama mama jangan berantem lagi ya... p gag mau kalian berantem terus... plisss...
Mom already sacrifice her life 4 diz f***in famz,,, why dont u just appreciate her.... jangan salahin mama lagi... mama gak salah... momz udah do d best.. seperti apa yang p dan mbak ina lakuin.. semua nya buat papa.. buat keluarga ini juga... jangan salahin lagi...


Pa... bentar lagi p ulang tahun... dari smua hadiah yang paling p pengen.... Cuma pelukan papa yang p paling kangeniinnn... udah berapa tahun papa bahkan gag ngasih ucapan selamat ke p??
P masih inget waktu ultah p yang ke 10, papa bahkan masih kuat untuk meluk p dan ngangkat p... that was the last... p kangen itu paaa....
P gag pengen apa2... Cuma kado itu yang paling p tunggu...

10-05-2008

Capek

P capek check up terus tp ga ad yg worth..!
Jumat k panti rapih konsul sm dr.Nyoman kertia..Mdh2n gagh kaya dr.Elias yg asal ngmng i2..Huh...
Capek..Ga bs udahan ya.. Pastiin 1 diagnosis aj gw knapa..?!Sakit ap gw..!!
Paragh atw ga trzrh d..Gw cm bth kepastian kuq..I2 aj titik gagh pake koma

Puzng

Puzing2.. Migren lg..Radang lg..Kpn c smbuhx..! Hhhuffh..
Pgn ngroni lg..!!Mu bli ah abz ni..!

Momz,i'm confused!!!

Momz..!!
P bngung momz..Seems like...P mulai sayang sm dy..Gmana dun momz..??
P kra p gagh bkal pny feeling lbh slain simpati sm dy....!! Gosh..!!
Iah momz...C niero i2..Yg pernah p ksh tw dlu..!
Duh..Should i keep?Or stop diz feeling..??
Bingung momz..Please help me..Which is d best..Pliss...

yeverythimg_alanis_mai theme today

i can be an asshole of the grandest kind
I can withhold like it's going out of style
I can be the moodiest baby and you've never met anyone
Who is as negative as I am sometimes

I am the wisest woman you've ever met
I am the kindest soul with whom you've connected
i have the bravest heart that you've ever seen and you've never met anyone
Who is as positive as I am sometimes

you see everything you see every part
you see all my light and you love my dark
you dig everything of which I'm ashamed
There's not anything to which you can't relate
And you're still here

i blame everyone else & not my own partaking
my passive aggressive-ness can be devastating
I'm terrified and mistrusting and you've never met anyone
Who is as closed down as I am sometimes

you see everything you see every part
you see all my light and you love my dark
you dig everything of which I'm ashamed
There's not anything to which you can't relate
And you're still here

What I resist persists and speaks louder than i know
What i resist you love no matter how low or high I go

I am the funniest woman that you've ever known
I am the dullest woman that you've ever known
I'm the most gorgeous woman that you've ever known and you've never met anyone
Who is as everything as I am sometimes

you see everything you see every part
you see all my light and you love my dark
you dig everything of which I'm ashamed
There's not anything to which you can't relate
And you're still here

Sekarang

Mgkn hrzx gue mulai jaga jarak y sm dy. Situasi ini makin lm makin ga ngenakin..P cpek..

P ga mw dy tpaksa nemenin p kmana2..P ga mw dy syg ma p krn tpaksa..
P pgn smua i2 tulus..

P haruz mundur!P ga blh lbh lama lg b'ada dlm posisi ini.Ga blh!
Dy cuma teman titik tanpa koma.

Even p sayang dy
p ttp hrz mndr!!

~smangat p!P ga blh manja~

aq saluthhhh

aqsaluth sama dia.. ditengah2 lingkungan yang aq sendiri gag tahan. dia bisa bertahan. dengan ambisinya. dengan keinginannya. dengan apa yang dia inginkan.
dia konsisten dengan apa yang udah dia jadwalkan. dengan apa yang dia katakan. dan dnegan apa yang menjadi konsekuensi dari ambisinya.
aq salutthhhh!!

belum pernah aq dengar dia mengeluh.
kepatuhannya pada orang tua.. sikap respectnya pada lingkungan sekitar dia...
he's so much responsible...
dia tau how to appreciate woman.. and didn't take 4 his own advantages. he knew how to act.. and he knew how to o adaptation with his environment...
he knew how to appreciate woman's feeling without hurt them but also konsisten..
aq saluth banget sama dia..
it's makes me.. more fallin' than before...
i love him
perhaps

Jeruk vs laptop

Gw heran!
Cm gr2 hr minggu kmrn gw plg jam 7 mlm..Kaga bs nemenin k care4 wt bli JERUK doank,,ngamukx ky kucing d injek ekorx..!!Msh lg mpe skrg..!
Kaya anak kcl bgt ga c..!!Gagh ngasih ongkos gw blk pula..Yah..Yg ni c gagh mslh y..Lgyn td pg gw jg cm blg buat FORMALITAS doank..!Gagh peduli dy mu ngasih duidh ap kaga..!Gw ga butuh..!!
Knp gw blg vs laptop??
Krn tujuan utama gw plg krmh y wt ngmbl laptop,,tp gr2 jeruk kurang ajar i2..!! Proses pengambl alihan laptop i2 jd thambat,,krna dg otomatisx,,sist gw yg keturunanx.. ikutan ngamuk jg..N ngelarang gw wt bwa tu laptop! KUNYUK!!!
Well,even pd akhrx,,gw bw jg tu laptop dg ATM GW TERSITA..!!
Tell me which is d worst..???!!!!